Stupid crap you've done.

Subject: Stupid crap you've done. Wed May 28, 2008 10:28 pm

For me this is endless. Many of you have been involved in my antics or have heard them already, so let me know the retarded shit you have done.

I'll give this up now. When working at Opry Land a few people and I met there to go to a concert or something. The parking lot there was around 3 acres. We got back to the lot and I had to piss badly. Apperantly everyone else was aware of a little detail I wasn't. I picked out a car and whipped out my wang. As soon as I started to leak a very large and very crazy Jamacian lady popped up out of the back seat of the car with a fudging machete screaming at me. Scared the hell out of me by the way. She came out of the car and I started hopping around the car still with my wang out but now every hop I am pissing all over myself, cars, and crazy lady while my so called friends are laughing their asses off. See they knew that the crazy lady was in the car but failed to mention it to me. So I almost became wangless. Jamacians still freak me out.
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The world is going crazy, I am just cutting in line.

Class of 1998 Joined : 08 Apr 2008 Posts : 80

i saw two guys urinate on a gas pump a few hours ago.

You are lucky to still be packing your wang.

Subject: Re: Stupid crap you've done. Sun Jun 08, 2008 10:01 am

Philip, me, Adam Eckhardt, and our buddy Squid were at a bar one night. We had too much to drink, we were leaving to go home, we walk out the back door and stumble upon an unlocked Robert Orr Sysco truck. Philip tells me to get the car and we ended up leaving with about 300lbs of pork. I also ended up with a construction barrel in my house that night. Good times.
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Subject: Re: Stupid crap you've done. Fri Jun 13, 2008 2:53 pm

I think one of the dumbest things I ever did was when I was 16. There was something wrong with my truck so I borrowed my dad's SUV and went shopping with a friend of mine. Of course I was a smoker back then and so was she. Well we're puffing away in the parent-mobile in adolescent-ignorant-bliss, sharing a cig and passing it back and forth between us. I don't know that we were keeping track of whose turn it was to ash but apparently some hot ash dropped during a pass and neither of us noticed.

When my dad went to drive the car and he put the seat back to where he could drive (cuz I'm short) he noticed this FAT burn in the upholstry of the floor board right between the seats. He asked me about it. What do I come up with but the MOST lame story. I told him that while we were at the bank that some teenage boys in the lane next to us had flicked cigarettes at us and one must have gotten in the car. He didn't buy the story. I had to write an apology, a promise that I would never smoke again (yeah right), and a report on the dangers of cigarette smoking. How terrible is that!?!

Another genius moment I had again happened when I was 16 and was driving down a curvy gravel road. I swear I was going the speed limit but I still lost control of my truck and fishtailed. I over-corrected and went off the road through a barbed wire fence. It kicked up so much dust that I didn't see the paint damage and thought "if I can just get home, no one will know". So, unable to find the original hole in the fence, I turn around in the field and prepare to plow back out through the barbed wire and merrily make my way home. Well, I as come out through the fence, what happens? I hit another truck. OH GOD THE EMBARASSMENT!! The police were definitely involved at this point. Imagine having to tell them why you're suddenly flying out of a field like the effing Dukes of Hazard!
And to add the cherry to the cake, earlier that month I had come home and smashed right into our garage door. I think my parents were thinking about kiling me at that point.

Subject: Re: Stupid crap you've done. Fri Jun 13, 2008 4:11 pm

Heather - that is HILARIOUS! I'm laughing so hard I'm crying... lol!

I totally do not remember you doing that! Did you even tell anyone you drove through the fence and hit a truck? I mean, obviously besides your parents?

What did your parents do to you and what happened with the cops?

Subject: Re: Stupid crap you've done. Tue Jun 17, 2008 2:47 pm

Class of 1998 Joined : 09 Apr 2008 Posts : 125

I was laughing hard at this one too!

What was the locale of this accident, or what town was it near?
In return for the answer to this question, I will advance a car wreck story all my own.

When I was going downtown to hang out at a club in Nashville (back in "those days"), I was on the way back home with another guy I had taken along with me. We were just going around, then came to a blinking red light. I slowed but did not stop. Collided with a guy in a truck. We both screamed, glass broke, metal twisted, but I checked Will and he was OK.

So I got out of the car to exchange insurance info. The guy got out of the truck, and said "You all okay?" To which I reply yes but before I can finish that word he gets in the truck and ditches the scene. Apparently he didn't want to stick around for the cops and all that so I did that. I got us a cab, leaving my wallet empty, and dropped Will off at his aunt and uncle's. A few weeks later my bruises were healing and he joined up with the military.

Subject: Re: Stupid crap you've done. Thu Jun 19, 2008 12:34 pm

the locale was in Goodlettsville on Jackson Rd. You used to be able to access Caldwell Lane off Long Hollow Pike from there as a short-cut to the park if you didn't want to go up to the light. The road no longer accesses Caldwell and it's only for residents of that road. I guess there were just too many wrecks.

Subject: Re: Stupid crap you've done. Mon Jun 30, 2008 4:10 pm

Now that Evan has joined the family i'll tell this one.
We were roomates for a bit at TSU. Its not very easy to live on that campus. Very loud bass busting through the walls got old quick. Also the assholes that stole all the toilet paper and shower curtins on the fist day. To get a little revenge we cut a very small hole in the screen of our window and would cut the lights so noone could look in. I brought a couple of blow guns in and we would pelt the hell out of people with jelly beans and paintballs. It was my favorite time from college. Seeing people run around screaming about getting stung still makes me laugh.
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The world is going crazy, I am just cutting in line.